Occupy Wall Street-- There is Still Hope

After being demoralized for thirteen chapters, Newman's Chapter Fourteen titled "Reconstructing Society" was just what I needed. Truly the icing on the cake-- If your icing prevents a feeling of utter hopelessness in society, that is. As I read about social movements, I couldn't help but think of Occupy Wall Street.

I learned that Occupy Wall Street is a reform movement, as it "attempts to change limited aspects of a society but does not seek to alter or replace major social institutions." Social movements, according to Newman, arise when people feel that resources like power, education, wealth, or justice, are not being distributed equally (Newman 2010). In Occupy's case, the resources are predominantly wealth. In fact, their slogan, "We Are the 99%," refers to the difference in wealth between the wealthiest 1% and the rest of the country.

A social movement must have an ideology. This refers to the group's values, which allow people to view the movement as morally "good" and become more likely to take risks for the cause-- arrest or financial setbacks, for example (Newman 2010). I've heard news commentators say that the Occupy movement doesn't have a message.  The issue seems to be, however, that the message isn't one simple demand. The protesters believe that Wall Street was reckless and caused the 2008 recession. They believe that the government was wrong to bail out irresponsible corporations. They are also protesting the collapsing environment, corruption in government, housing policies, and labor standards. I found an article by Douglas Rushkoff for CNN that explains another aspect while addressing the opinion that Occupy has no message:

"Anyone who says he has no idea what these folks are protesting about is not being truthful. Whether we agree with them or not, we all know what they are upset about, and we all know that there are investment bankers working on Wall Street getting richer while things for most of the rest of us are getting tougher. What upsets banking's defenders and politicians alike is the refusal of this movement to state its terms or set its goals in the traditional language of campaigns. They mean that there is an inappropriate and correctable disconnect between the abundance America produces and the scarcity its markets manufacture."

(Here's the rest of the article, if you're interested: http://www.cnn.com/2011/10/05/opinion/rushkoff-occupy-wall-street/index.html)

According to Newman, the movements that are successful are very organized. I couldn't find an article that spelled out the structure of the movement, but this is what I gathered:  Occupy Wall Street's decision-making group is the mainly The New York City General Assembly.  It is lead by a committee, and there is no single leader. About seventy smaller organizations contribute to the movement's operation.  They have nightly meetings that are open to the public. I'm not sure that this type of organization is like the successful model Newman talks about, but it seems to be working.

The future of Occupy Wall Street remains to be seen, but I can't imagine it will be going away any time soon. The movement is encouraging to me-- I'm glad that people still believe that change for the better can be accomplished, even when the situation seems dismal.

Newman, David. Sociology. Ed 8. 2010.

Rushkoff, David. "You Think Occupy Wall St. is a Phase? You Don't Get It." 5 October 2011. Online. http://www.cnn.com/2011/10/05/opinion/rushkoff-occupy-wall-street/index.html

Impression Management, THE SEQUEL (Assignment 14)

When flipping through the text to decide which sociological concept had the biggest impact on me, I kept coming back to impression management. Then I re-read my October 14 blog post titled "Impression Management" and realized that I sounded like a total nut job. Who on earth would put so much effort into projecting a specific image? Well, pretty much everyone, I think. I've been looking for people managing their images, and I haven't had to look far.

The place that I've noticed it the most is customer service... Oh my goodness, customer service, the perfect example. There is no way that the girl behind the counter at Starbucks is really that excited to see me. She's even more excited when her manager is standing next to her, it seems. I get it, though. I worked at Old Navy for two years (worst job EVER, and I worked in corn fields for two summers). This might be a special kind of impression management: the required kind. When I was behind the counter, I didn't want to smile and make small talk; I wanted to smash my head against a wall repeatedly, but I talked and smiled like I meant it.

Impression management is alive and well in fashion around campus. The guy who walks through Bush Library like it's the catwalk comes to mind, but every jacket, shirt, hat, and pair of pants is projecting an image, some harder than others. My goal when I get ready for the day in the morning is to look natural, like I'm not trying too hard; but some days it takes me an hour to achieve this look (Yikes, I hate admitting that). But this type of projection is obviously not limited to clothing. I spent ten bucks on a wreath for my front door today so the yuppies in my neighborhood wouldn't think I was a scrooge.

This is the type of thing I'm up against around here. Honestly...

I know that some of my examples aren't strictly projection tools. It's definitely possible that the girl at Starbucks was, in fact, a really nice person who loves her job. And the people projecting with their clothing around campus are probably also using their clothing as a form of self expression. But noticing the impression management all over has made me have a better sense of humor about the things I do to project a mature, stylish, or even a "Christmas-y" image:  After all, everybody's doing it.

Baby Boomers Change Advertising

About 76 million people were born between the years of 1946 and 1964. They are referred to as baby boomers, and they're changing marketing in a big way.

Traditionally, advertising has been aimed at people between the ages of 18 and 49. People 50 and older were literally called "the undesirables," according to a 2005 Businessweek article titled "Love Those Boomers."  But with most baby boomers 50 or older, attitudes are changing.

"The boomers are particularly attractive because they tend to have free time. They're less likely to be raising young children and their careers are established and stable," says Paolo Timoni, CEO of Piaggio U.S.A., parent company of Vespa Motor Scooters in the same Businessweek article. When Vespa began marketing in the United States in 2000 after a 15-year absence, they thought the people buying their scooters would be people in their mid 20's, looking for a cheap way to get around. What they found, though, was that their best customers were baby boomers, who remembered Vespas from when they were young.

With boomers living and working longer, they will have even more money to spend.  According to Matt Thornhill, president of the Boomer Project, a Richmond Virginia consulting firm, "If you're going to expand your business, you will have to market to the aging boomer."

Businessweek. "Love Those Boomers." 24 October 2005. Online. http://www.businessweek.com/magazine/content/05_43/b3956201.htm.


Image: http://www.thebabyboomershealth.com/why-ba-boomers-need-long-term-care-insurance/

My (Very Limited) Immigration Story (Assignment 13)

When trying to find out facts about my family's history, I found that nobody really knows the details. A few random facts are known, but I had a hard time getting the answers I was looking for.

My mother informed me that her mother's father came from Sweden when he was eighteen and started farming here. When I asked her why he left Sweden she said that she'd been told he was "looking for a better life." My mother didn't know the details about the other side of her family.

When I talked to my father about his side of the family, he said that both his parents' families came from England. His side of the family seems to have come a generation earlier than my mother's side of the family, as it was my father's great grandparents who first came to the U.S. My father didn't know many details except that his great grandfather on his dad's side had been a professional boxer. As far as a reason for leaving England, my dad said that they were "looking for opportunities."

This is not my family, but I imagine they looked something like this...?

If my family were to come to the United States today, entry would be much more difficult.  When immigrants arrived on Ellis Island, the process of becoming a citizen took only 3-5 hours. If people were healthy and had no criminal record, they were usually allowed entry. Today, my family members would probably need the sponsorship of a family member or potential employer already living in the United States. They would have to prove that they have skills that would be valuable to the country. Still, the process could take decades, which would likely be too long if they were facing extreme hardship in their countries.

I think immigration is such a volatile topic today because it's easy to forget that almost all of us are descendants of immigrants.  Newman explains it very well, saying, "Immigration creates a variety of cultural fears:  fear that a nation can't control its own boarders, fear that an ethnically homogeneous population will be altered through intermarriage, fear of the influx of a 'strange' way of life, and fear that newcomers will encroach on property, clog the educational system, and suck up social benefits owned and largely paid for by 'natives.'"

According to Newman, however, immigration offsets "the problems of negative population growth and an aging workforce in developed destination countries." Immigrants also fill many of the jobs that people already in the United States simply won't do:  picking crops or driving a taxi, for example. The United States has never had a completely homogeneous population; the "face" of the U.S. is always changing.

Image: http://www.nytimes.com/2009/07/05/nyregion/05bookshelf.html
Newman, David. Sociology. Ed 8. 2010.

Assault Prevention

When it comes to sexual assault, victim blaming is common. According to Newman, this places nearly all the responsibility to prevent sexual assault on potential victims: women. We always see the prevention tips to avoid being assaulted, but this poster flips the responsibility to a potential assaulter.

You wouldn't believe the debate set off by this poster at its website:
http://front.moveon.org/the-most-effective-sexual-assault-prevention-plan-ever/
One person writes: "Whew! That was a close one. Being a man, I am only inches away from anonymously raping every woman that I see. Thanks liberals and feminazis from saving female kind from me."  I was quite surprised to see responses like these, as it seems the only people who should be offended are assaulters.

Newman, David. Sociology. Ed 8. 2010.

Angry, but for Good Reason (Assignment 12)



When my boyfriend called me on Wednesday afternoon, I was in a great mood:  I had just finished my last class of the day and was almost all set to depart for my parents' house. The only thing I had left to do was read Newman's Chapter 12, "Sex and Gender."  When my boyfriend arrived home two hours later, though, my mood was a bit different. Okay, a lot different. What happened? Where do I even start?

The very first page of the chapter helped me realize how little things have changed for women in this country in the last 200 years. The Declaration of Independence, rewritten at a women's rights convention in 1848 reads, in part, "In view of their social degradation and in view of the unjust laws above mentioned, and because women do feel themselves aggrieved, oppressed, and fraudulently deprived of the most sacred rights, we insist that they have immediate admission to all the rights and privileges which belong to them as citizens of the United States." This statement could have been written yesterday.

I learned of a study performed by the American Association of University Women that approximately 83% of girls have been the victims of varying levels of sexual harassment in elementary, middle, and high school. In addition, 2 of 3 female college students has experienced sexual harassment during college, but only about 10% report it.

The passage on rape made me sick. I learned that often rape isn't even considered a crime against the woman but rather a crime against her husband or father whose property is violated. Also, the threat of rape is a constant reminder to women that men are more powerful. Women often don't report rape due to the fact that they are subjected to being required to prove their innocence rather than the guilt of the offender. Perhaps the most shocking statement, to me, was that in a study of high school students, "52% agreed that most women fantasize about being raped by a man..."

The "Gender Inequality in Families" segment made me annoyed to realize that I am conforming to gender roles by performing the tasks "essential to the daily functioning of the household" while my boyfriend's chores are "infrequent, irregular, or optional" (Newman 2010). And when my boyfriend does these chores, I'm very likely to show excessive appreciation, as if he went above and beyond; I don't get praised for doing laundry or dishes, though, and for some reason I don't expect to.

The section about gender and the economy made me feel hopeless. Women earn only 78% of what men earn, and the gap increases with age. In addition, occupations like physician, engineer, dentist, and lawyer, which are traditionally male occupations, are still extremely dominated by men.

These points are just a few of the angry-mood-inducers I came across in this chapter. No other chapter in Newman's Sociology has had quite this effect on me. I must admit that venting about the injustices in this blog has been quite therapeutic, and hopefully, after reading this, my boyfriend will understand why I hated him so much on that Wednesday.

Newman, David. Sociology. Ed 8. 2010.

Image: http://www.google.com/imgres?um=1&hl=en&biw=1249&bih=615&tbm=isch&tbnid=STL1GwkJEValdM:&imgrefurl=http://www.angrybirds-online.info/tag/angry-birds-graphics/&docid=XXjKCLOzHEk5iM&imgurl=http://www.angrybirds-online.info/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/AngryRedBird.png&w=400&h=400&ei=NwzTTsuZEsfkiALxmZnpDA&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=982&vpy=273&dur=203&hovh=225&hovw=225&tx=205&ty=128&sig=100147541499453716487&page=3&tbnh=120&tbnw=125&start=36&ndsp=21&ved=1t:429,r:20,s:36

Sorting by Race

While doing research on race and its origins, I came across a website called "Race:  The Power of an Illusion." It has a great activity in which you sort pictures of people into the racial categories American Indian, Asian, Black, Hispanic/Latino, and White. You can take the quiz through the link under the photo:

http://www.pbs.org/race/002_SortingPeople/002_00-home.htm

As you can probably imagine, it's extremely difficult to categorize the pictures into the groups provided. After taking the quiz, you can divide the photos into different color groups, light to dark, and, as expected, "light" and "dark" skin can be found in several racial categories. The text echos this point:  ". . . people who consider themselves 'white' may actually have darker skin and curlier hair than some people who consider themselves 'black'" (Newman 2010).

The activities on this website are, perhaps, geared toward a younger audience, but they are a good reminder that race is a social construct, and that how people are classified is completely arbitrary.

Newman, David. Sociology. Ed 8. 2010.

Racial Labelling (Assignment 11)

The passage "Why Isn't Barack Obama White?" in Newman's Sociology, Chapter 11, really made me look at race in a way that I never have. After all, Obama is half white, but, as the text points out, "He is called the first black or African American president, usually not the first biracial president and certainly not the first half-white president" (Newman 2010).  While I read this passage, I couldn't help but think about my only niece Ava, who was born just two months ago.

 Ava is my sister's daughter. My sister is white and her husband is half black and half Hispanic. We all wonder about what her hair texture and eye color will end up being, but I'd never wondered how she and others will identify her racially. According to the hypodescent rule, which states "racially mixed people are always assigned the status of the subordinate group," Ava will likely be considered black or Hispanic by others (Newman 2010).

 Isn't she just the cutest? I don't care what race she is :)

 I asked my sister her thoughts on how Ava will identify herself, and she believes that the culture she is immersed in will likely be the main factor. My sister and her husband behave predominantly in accordance with white culture, and my bother-in-law hasn't really embraced black or Hispanic culture. If this is true, Ava will identify herself as white.

So society may view Ava as black or Hispanic, while Ava may view herself as white. I truly hope this doesn't create an "identity crisis" of some kind for her. The human mind is constantly working to place people and things into organized categories, but the pressure to label people as a single race is unreasonable.  After all, almost all of us are a mix of some kind.

Newman, David. Sociology. Ed 8. 2010.



Rural Areas and Military Recruitment



According to David Newman's Sociology, people with few opportunities are likely to join the military. Newman states, "To people with limited educational and occupational opportunities, military service holds out the promise of stable employment, comprehensive insurance coverage, a living wage, free schooling, the development of marketable skills, and an escape from poverty." People living in economically depressed, rural areas are much more likely to join the military (Newman, 2010).

According to a Washington Post article titled "Youths in Rural U.S. Are Drawn To Military" by Ann Scott Tyson, people in sparsely populated areas are much more likely to join the military than those in major cities. In fact, 40% of enlistees come from the South and 24% from the West. Many people in these rural areas are financially limited. "Nearly two-thirds of Army recruits in 2004 came from counties in which median household income is below the U.S. median," according to Tyson.  People are being "pushed" from their communities into the military, which offers stable employment.

Recruiters are targeting these areas. For example, the military had its worst recruiting year in 2005; but in the unemployment-stricken area of Martinsville, PA (unemployment 12.1%), recruiters signed up 94% of their targeted recruits. One recruiter, Mr. Barber, in Martinsville attributed his success to the fact that "The job market is dwindling, and it's hard for a young man or woman to find something other than the fast-food business" (Tyson, 2005).

Sadly, American casualties in recruits from these rural areas are high. According to David Newman, "By 2006, 34% of U.S. military personnel killed in Iraq came from the poorest quarter of families, while only 17% came from the richest quarter" (Newman 2010). In this way, the government benefits from the economic struggle of those in rural areas. Though many people join the military out of patriotism, it's a fair prediction to say that as long as there are few other options, people will choose the military.


Newman, David. Sociology. Ed 8. 2010.

Tyson, Ann Scott. "Youths in Rural U.S. Are Drawn To Military." The Washington Post. 4 November 2005. Online http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2005/11/03/AR2005110302528.html

Hypothetical Family Living "Above" Poverty (Assignment 10)

Monthly Costs:
Mortgage/Rent: $1,000
Insurance- Family Plan: $250
Child care: $600
Food: $750
Car Payment: $175
Gas: $150
Electricity: $85
Water: $20
Basic cable/Internet: $70
Clothes: $200
Appliances: $150
Eating out/ entertainment: $200

Total Monthly: 3650
Total Yearly: $43,800

Possible cuts:
Getting rid of the car: (reduces costs yearly by $3,900, but bus passes are $1560/year) saving $2340/year
Cut cable, Internet, and entertainment: saving $3240/year
Move to a smaller living space: savings up to $5400/year
Cut insurance for state insurance (the family could only be eligible for state insurance if neither of the parents' work offered insurance, so this is unlikely): $3000/year in savings
Cut clothing costs in half: saving $1200/year
Total yearly after cuts: $28,620

To estimate costs, I referenced what I pay for my son and me and multiplied by two when applicable (food, clothes, entertainment).

I didn't feel that I could cut anything else from this family's budget to get under the $21,834 poverty line. The cuts that I did make didn't even seem reasonable. Imagine how difficult it would be to get two children to school and daycare and two parents to work on time via the bus; or how miserable the family would be living in a one-bedroom apartment with no entertainment. It's possible that the children wouldn't fit in at school and daycare because of having old or misfitting clothes.  They wouldn't know what the other kids were talking about when they talked of popular TV shows and movies. 

As the children got older, they might not want to invite friends over to their small house.  Their health could suffer on a limited food budget and with little access to health care.  Teachers might not give them as much attention as they would a wealthy child, and their education could be of a worse quality as a result.  Maybe they wouldn't be able to be involved in extracurricular activities due to limited funds or the necessity to start working as early as possible.  This would hurt their applications to college, if they chose to attend. Also, because their parents income is not below the poverty line, they wouldn't get as much funding for college and might be forced to work part or full time while going to school, which could hurt their GPA's and affect their ability to complete homework and stay enrolled in school. Not completing college would make getting a high-paying job difficult, and their children could be in a similar or worse situation than they were.

Deskilling

Deskilling is, according to Newman, "subdivision of low-level jobs into small, highly specific tasks requiring less-skilled employees." At first glance, deskilling doesn't seem like a bad thing, but it is harmful to workers.

Unskilled, inexperienced, or low-paid workers in deskilled jobs report lower levels of job satisfaction than those working in skilled professions.  Workers at the bottom of bureaucracies often become discouraged due to feeling they have little influence and control or that they are easily replaceable. Workers in this category are likely to be on an assembly line, performing dull, repetitive tasks; because their part is only a small portion of the process, it is difficult for them to feel a sense of accomplishment, as they don't create the entire product.

Some examples of deskilling include computer software deciding whether or not a company should insure a person, an instant espresso machine creating drinks instead of a barista, or a person putting two car parts together on a line instead of building the whole thing.

http://www.cartoonstock.com/directory/a/assembly_line.asp

Newman, David. Sociology. Ed 8. 2010.





Competition (Assignment 9)

From our first day in school we're taught to compete with one another:  We're praised for getting the best grade and punished for getting the worst, and it never ends. In a 2011 article by Kit Richerts in The Apple, Dr. Marty Covington, who has studied the effects of competition in the classroom for over ten years, says he believes that competition hinders motivation, especially in classes where grading on a curve is happening. "Covington's fundamental belief is that the root of all academic motivation is for students to preserve and enhance a sense of self worth," says Richerts.  If students try and fail, they're likely to preserve their self worth by not trying next time (Richerts 2011).

"Throughout our school years we are taught to believe from society that grades dislay intelligence. Because of this, our motivation, learning, and personal growth are placed second to attaining the ultimate goal--the grade. . . . We are programmed to imitate what the teacher wants. If we don't we get a bad grade. . . . Imitation, competition and fear of grades hinders our discovery (Bell & McGrane 1999, printed in Newman's Sociology)

At a previous school, I was in an Ethics class.  My professor was extremely smart and graded on a curve, so I wanted more than anything to do well in his class.  He assigned weekly papers that were to cover some aspect of the topics discussed in class that week.  I always wrote about the points that he emphasized and often used his exact wording, which always got me 10 of 10 points. One time, though, I decided to write about a topic that he didn't emphasize as much.  I thought this would be a good chance for me to prove that I could do my own research and tie it into the topics he emphasized. I usually spent about an hour writing these papers, but this one took me at least two.  I did a ton of research and learned more than I ever had while writing these papers. The finished product was perfect. I was so proud to submit it in class.

When he started passing back the papers the following week, I was excited to see what he'd have to say about mine. When he handed it back to me though, he said "Um, you really missed the point on this one." I was crushed but excused my poor work by saying that I hadn't really understood the lecture (I had). "It showed..." he said. I received an 7/10 on the paper, the worst I'd ever had, and I never wrote a paper in his class like that again, as I wanted to be one of the 8 who received an A in the class.

As a result of this type of learning, I limit creativity and innovation to places where I know it's safe.  I worked at a law firm for about a year recently.  When the attorney gave me work, I did it the way I knew she would want it done.  Even if I had a better idea, I didn't employ it.  It's sad, but in a system where competition dominates, we have to please those in power or we'll be left behind.

Newman, David. Sociology. Ed 8. 2010.

Richerts, Kit. "Why Grading on the Curve Hurts." The Apple. 2011. http://theapple.monster.com/benefits/articles/5658-why-grading-on-the-curve-hurts

Drug Quiz

Try to guess which drugs go along with these side effects (Hint: 3 of the 4 are legal)

A: Difficulty walking / Blurred vision / Slurred speech / Slowed reaction times / Impaired memory and blackouts / Mental confusion / Paralysis of the nerves that move the eyes / Difficulty with muscle coordination / Persistent learning and memory problems / Liver disease / Unintentional injuries

B: Impaired judgment and motor coordination / Shortened attention span and distractibility / Anxiety and panic attacks /Increased heart rate / Increased risk of heart attack

C: Shortness of breath and dizziness / Lung diseases such as chronic bronchitis and emphysema / Heart disease, including stroke, heart attack, vascular disease, and aneurysm (burst blood vessel)/ Lung, mouth, throat, bladder, pancreas and kidney cancer / Dry skin and premature wrinkles

D: Jitteriness / Increased heart rate / Increased risk of panic attack / Irregular heartbeat / Prolonged depression / Sleep deprivation / Irritability / Increased blood sugar

Answers: D: Caffeine C: Tobacco B: Marijuana A: Alcohol

As you can see, the negative effects of drugs have nothing to do with whether they are legal or illegal. There is much more to it.

"As with deviance in general, the very definition of which substances are 'illegal' is influenced by powerful interests," According to David Newman in Sociology. In 2006, $157 billion was brought in from alcohol sales in the United States. Tobacco, too, brings in billions each year and is an industry on which many states depend. Though the government limits the use of tobacco and alcohol, it never goes as far as to criminalize use (Newman 249).

http://www.abovetheinfluence.com/facts/drugstobacco/
Newman, David. Sociology. Ed 8. 2010.

Deterrance (Assignment 8)

According to David Newman's Sociology, the deterrence theory is "a theory of deviance positing that people will be prevented from engaging in deviant acts if they judge the costs of such an act to outweigh its benefits." In simpler terms, this theory assumes that people are rational and consider the positive and negative results that will come from doing something.  If the negatives are more than the positives, the task is not worth doing and vice verse.

If this theory were correct, then states without the death penalty would have lower incidences of homicide, but that is not the case. In fact, "the homicide rate in the 38 states with the death penalty has been 48% to 100% higher than the 12 states without the death penalty" (Newman 227).  It could be argued that states in certain areas of the country are more or less prone to crime, but the trend applies even to neighboring states with different capital punishment laws.

Supporters of the deterrence theory argue that punishment must be quick and severe to deter acts; and capital punishment is, by no means, swift. According to David Newman, "On average, death row inmates spend almost 13 years awaiting execution, a figure that has been growing steadily for three decades" (Newman 236). Supporters also argue that acts of violence are not thoroughly thought through; rather, they are spontaneous.

Though its application is not perfect with the death penalty, deterrence plays a huge role in less passionate crime.  According to the state of Minnesota, one's first DWI is punishable by up to 90 days in jail and a $1,000 fine. If that isn't enough deterrence to someone, and he or she still drives drunk, his or her punishment will, hopefully, deter others from offending.  My boyfriend was recently written a $106 seat belt ticket and has been wearing his seat belt consistently since. In this way, deterrence is the basis for all law enforcement.

Though the deterrence theory assumes that people are rational, that isn't always true, especially in passionate crime like homicide. Deterrence is, however, an important tool in law enforcement, and, therefore, should not be discounted.

Newman, David. Sociology. Ed 8. 2010.

http://www.house.leg.state.mn.us/hrd/pubs/dwiover.pdf

Why Do Men Abuse Women?



After reading passage "Personal and Institutional Responses to Intimate Violence" in Chapter 7 of Newman's Sociology, I did some research on abuse within intimate relationships. The question that repeatedly came up was "why do women stay in abusive relationships?" The text provides many reasons:  Being emotionally, physically, or economically trapped; fear; and lack of assistance and public resources (Newman 214) A quick web search provided hundreds of articles and blogs on this topic. However, the question I feel we should be asking  is why do men abuse girlfriends/wives? And how can we prevent it in the first place?

According to The Better Health Channel's website, many abusers hurt women to control them. They feel it is their right and that they can behave how they choose in their own homes. Some men use violence to stress that they are the head of the household.  Drugs and alcohol can also play a role:  In about half of reported domestic abuse cases, the perpetrator is intoxicated. 

To add to the problem, men are likely to resist accepting help in dealing with anger problems. Some think that masculinity means being strong and silent and that accepting help is weak or feminine. Others believe that they are not at fault-- that the provoker had it coming.

Now that we know some reasons behind it, how can it be prevented? I didn't have much luck finding resources about prevention, but it's my opinion that talking to kids about the consequences of hurting others is key and then keeping the dialogue open throughout adolescence and adulthood.  As a woman, I've had ideas pounded into my head for years on how to avoid being hurt by men:  Carry pepper spray, walk away when he gets angry, tell someone if he hurts you, etc.  But I don't think the reverse is being pounded into young male brains. Parents need to teach boys the consequences of hurting others; boys also need to know that asking for help is not a sign of weakness.

Abuse is, unfortunately, a part of many peoples' lives.  I chose to talk about men abusing female partners, but, as Newman's Sociology points out, abuse can happen to anyone for so many reasons. I truly believe that teaching our children respect and leading by example can make a huge difference in their choices to abuse or not abuse others.

http://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/bhcv2/bhcarticles.nsf/pages/Domestic_violence_why_men_abuse_women?open

Newman, David. Sociology. Ed 8. 2010.

Image: http://www.google.com/imgres?q=domestic+violence+graphic&hl=en&gbv=2&biw=1192&bih=587&tbm=isch&tbnid=HFPR-VEoGDCFsM:&imgrefurl=http://abduzeedo.com/most-creative-ads-series-domestic-abuse&docid=xcRGKV2k_3ggMM&imgurl=http://imgs.abduzeedo.com/files/articles/domestic-violence/img7.jpg&w=600&h=380&ei=PeGlTv3dIeeRiQLw6LSnDQ&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=599&vpy=150&dur=184&hovh=179&hovw=282&tx=181&ty=95&sig=110286977754190018626&page=1&tbnh=124&tbnw=166&start=0&ndsp=20&ved=1t:429,r:4,s:0

Family Values

According to the U.S. Bureau of the Census, a family is defined as "two or more persons, including the householder who are related by birth, marriage, or adoption, and who live together as one household."  Based on this definition, I don't think my household would be considered a family:  I live with my son and boyfriend.  Before my boyfriend moved in with my son and I about two years ago, however, my son and I would have been considered a "single female parent with children under 18" family (Newman 195). It certainly feels more like a family now, though. Anyway, even though we're not officially a family by the government's standards, we have family values. 

My son knows not saying "please" will have consequences just like my boyfriend and I know that saying certain four-letter words will have consequences. We value health and try to eat leafy greens each day.  We encourage my son to respect others and be accepting of differences.

Every family has values. They're often passed down from generation to generation.  When we think of family values we often think of ideas like "respect your elders" and "family comes first."  But can negative values like racism can be passed down, too? I think so.

 

According to ZenFamilyHabits.com, ten essential family values exist:  Belonging, flexability, respect, honesty, generosity, forgiveness, curiosity, communication, responsibility, and traditions.  The author acknowledges that values differ from family to family, but I really like this list.

Family values guide everyones' decisions to some extent. My family is practical, so my first degree was in x-ray because the job market in hospitals was stable and the degree would only take three years. My family values education; so when I couldn't find a job after technical college, I chose to return to school to get a bachellor's degree. 

I'm thankful for my family's values, as they have shaped me into who I am. I'm excited for my "non-family household" to instill positive values in my son that he will someday be thankful for.

http://www.zenfamilyhabits.net/2010/02/top-10-essential-family-values/
image: http://www.babble.com/CS/blogs/strollerderby/archive/2008/07/08/my-kids-are-racist-and-yours-are-too.aspx
Newman, David. Sociology. Ed 8. 2010.

Body Dysmorphic Disorder

In the "Illusion of Youth" passage within the "Managing Impressions" section of the text, Newman briefly touches on a condition called body dysmorphic disorder:  "And about 2% of the population is so self-conscious about their looks that their lives are constricted in some significant way, from feeling inhibited during lovemaking to becoming homebound or even suicidal" (Newman 167).

I was first introduced to this condition on the Oprah Winfrey show. Two of her guests were young, attractive people suffering with body dysmorphic disorder.  They were so limited by their condition that they could not drive because of the mirrors involved (they'd get into crashes due to looking into the mirrors instead of at the road). And, if I remember correctly, neither of them were able to work. They truly thought of themselves as monsters. I couldn't find a clip of this episode, but I was able to find a similar one from the Dr. Phil Show (you really only need to watch the first few minutes to understand what it's all about):

I can't imagine being one of Diana's loved ones. In the clip, her mother says that when she tells Diana that she's beautiful, Diana responds, "Mother, don't lie to me."  How helpless everyone around her must feel. 

Body dysmorphic disorder is an extreme psychological condition, but research shows that 30 to 40% of U.S. adults are concerned with their physical appearance. Another study showed that 90% of white and 30% of black teens are not satisfied with their bodies (the difference between those two figures is explained more on page 164). I, too, often feel dissatisfied with my physical appearance. I think the key is to learn to focus on  the good things we have going for us and to pay less attention to physical flaws.

Newman, David. Sociology. Ed 8. 2010.

Impression Management

Impression management is a huge part of every day in my life. From the time I get dressed in the morning to the time I come home and post a last blog comment, I'm managing outsiders' perspectives. Some say that they don't care what others think, but everyone is, whether consciously or subconsciously, putting an image out for judgement. We manage impressions and "sell" our image with almost every aspect of us:  The way we look, talk and behave and the groups in which we are members are a few factors that mold others' impressions of us.

The most dramatic impression management that I engage in is when I'm with my son. I feel that his teachers, other parents at school, doctors, and everyone else for that matter expects me to act ditsy or uneducated because of my young age; and I compensate for this in every way possible. At parent-teacher conferences, doctors appointments, and other "mom" functions, I make sure to dress "older;" no graphic t-shirts or flip flops-- always loose fitting, practical mom attire.  I've noticed a good response from sweaters and chords combined with my dark-framed glasses (I hope it looks better than it sounds).

   < Perhaps these will help? ;)




It's certainly not all about the look though. I've also got to be armed with the proper small talk about the new principal or addition to the playground or, when all else fails, the great/awful weather we've been having!

My son recently had his hearing tested at the Children's Hospital, and his father (who I am no longer seeing but still get along well with) attended the appointment as well. I had my "adult pants" on and felt prepared but was completely mortified when his father said both "like" and "whatever" to the specialist.  I instantly thought, "Great, now she thinks we're stupid." This somewhat irrational anger at my son's father's "exposing" us made me realize how important this image is to me.

I know I could spend less effort managing my image. My son's teachers and doctors and other parents at his school are all great people, and they probably wouldn't be completely disgusted if I did wear flip flops occasionally.  I know the image is only a big deal to me.  Still, it makes me feel more confident in a world I don't feel comfortable being myself in, so I'm going to hold onto it... for now, anyway.


Image: http://www.google.com/imgres?q=snl+mom+jeans&um=1&hl=en&biw=1441&bih=687&tbm=isch&tbnid=Vi_cx7ZGYg1foM:&imgrefurl=http://coleandjosephine.blogspot.com/2010/03/tina-fey-is-my-hero.html&docid=wNEgWKtIEYdbRM&imgurl=https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-JjP3ZiT9AWyH0d3pKP4AWrclPRTPEBzFV2LwzLnFv_tYSLTXnMXQ1sD9OscK3CjDESq2sM7HwvVn9vVMKhIiHNBM3WReV00g5yQ6iIk4GGVWtHqS6Beh4T9sptXVx5jWnBQwhCCy2-gD/s400/mom_jeans.jpg&w=400&h=301&ei=Pw6ZTtbPCuXY0QHIr6WwBA&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=757&vpy=191&dur=1215&hovh=195&hovw=259&tx=142&ty=133&sig=110286977754190018626&page=1&tbnh=146&tbnw=195&start=0&ndsp=19&ved=1t:429,r:9,s:0

Wedding Rituals

Pages 111-120, entitled "Funeral Rituals in the Netherlands" describe the different ways the Dutch deal with death.  The rituals vary immensely from one religion or culture to the next. This inspired me to check out some wedding rituals from around the world.

South Africa: In some South African weddings, the couples' parents carry torches lit by fire in their own homes. They then take the fire to the newlyweds' home, where a new fire is lit. 

Japan: Some Japanese ceremonies include drinking Sake; it signifies unity. Some brides choose to wear the traditional kimono, though a white dress is also common.

Turkey: Many couples in Turkey continue to celebrate with family and friends for days after the ceremony has ended.

Jamaica: At traditional Jamaican wedding receptions, rum cake is served. The leftover cake is then mailed to family members unable to attend the reception.

Switzerland: Brides at traditional Swiss weddings wear a wreath crown to signify being young and unmarried. After the ceremony, the wreath is burned, and it is viewed as lucky if it burns quickly.

Yemen: The sweet desserts served at Yemeni wedding receptions signify a sweet life for the newlywed couple.

Venezuela: It's not uncommon for a newlywed couple to sneak away from their reception without saying goodbye. It's even considered lucky (worldweddingtraditions.com).

I couldn't determine with certainty how common these rituals are, but they certainly are different. It got me thinking about the typical Christian, American wedding traditions, and they likely seem strange to outsiders. ("So the person who catches the bouquet will be the next to get married?") But however diverse the rituals, happiness and celebration are a common theme.

Image: http://www.google.com/imgres?q=wedding+graphics&hl=en&biw=1441&bih=687&tbm=isch&tbnid=4HFJBKS7-Lr0dM:&imgrefurl=http://www.webweaver.nu/clipart/wedding2.shtml&docid=DSg5APZ6F0fUFM&w=245&h=267&ei=uTeRTt-yOsa9tgf4yZWDDA&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=195&vpy=185&dur=5826&hovh=213&hovw=196&tx=109&ty=105&page=1&tbnh=156&tbnw=143&start=0&ndsp=23&ved=1t:429,r:0,s:0

http://www.worldweddingtraditions.com/locations/north_american_traditions/united_states_traditions.html

Nature v. Nurture

Chapter Five of Newman's Sociology is entitled "Building Identity: Socialization." In this chapter, the idea of nature verses nuture is introduced.  According to Newman, those on the "nature" side believe that "we are who we are because we were born that way." Those on the "nurture" side believe that "we are who we are because of the way we were treated while growing up" (Newman 127).

When I read this section, it reminded me of a video I saw several years ago about a girl known as Genie. I'll summarize her story, but here's the link to the first section the video if you'd like to view it: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dEnkY2iaKis (If you watch the video: What do you think of their calling her a "wild" or "feral" child?)

Genie was abused and completely neglected for the first thirteen years of her life.  She was strapped almost constantly to a potty chair and beaten often. When police officers found her, she was thirteen years old and unable to talk or walk properly. She was wearing a diaper and was extremely malnourished.



 "Genie"

Scientists saw her as a perfect study subject in the nature verses nurture debate. She had clearly not been nurtured:  she was never allowed outside, very rarely spoken to, and never shown affection. When police found her, she was functioning like an infant. After her rescue, she lived with various scientists and foster parents. She learned to use simple words and was able to sign to express herself.

Genie's story proves that environment has an impact on development. It's unclear, however, what Genie's abilities could have been, had she been properly cared for: It's very possible that she would have still functioned at a low level. That's why the nature v. nurture question still lingers.  No methods exist to determine the percentage of development affected by biology or environment.

This video shows how being ignored affects a baby. It's easy to see how neglect could affect a child.





http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=apzXGEbZht0&feature=BFa&list=PLE3C210B5E3118EB3&lf=results_video

Photo: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Genie_(feral_child).jpg

Newman, David. Sociology: Exploring the Architecture of Everyday Life. 8 Ed. 2010.